Part-Time Taoist Priest 12

by Velvet · February 26, 2020

The Founder’s Temper

Later, Xie Lingya learned that the man who was disrespecting the founder amongst the crowd outside of Baoyang Temple was called Chen Mo. Unlike his name, he was not quiet at all¹—quite the opposite, he especially loved to voice his opinions.

Chen Mo was a white-collar worker in a nearby company. The news about Baoyang Temple’s miraculous talismans had reached his office a few days ago. At that time, he had already made several conjectures about the mechanics behind the mosquito-repelling effect.

Today, Chen Mo and his friend came to check it personally. Unfortunately for him, they neither found any mosquitos nor unraveled the secret behind the mosquito-repelling effect.

Unhappy, Chen Mo started ranting in front of Baoyang’s entrance. Anyway, he had never believed in gods and superstitions.

After Chen Mo heard Xie Lingya’s words, he thought Xie Lingya was a worshipper here. He didn’t take his warning seriously at all—who cared whether the statue was brass or clay? That being the case, he didn’t bother to reply.

Of course, Xie Lingya was not inclined to chat with him either and just went back into the temple.

For Chen Mo, the next two days were miserable.

Out of nowhere, an electric bike ran into him.

When he was crossing the road, he felt someone push him, causing him to almost be hit by a passing car, but his colleague said no one had touched him at all.

Even when just innocently walking on the streets he was almost struck by a falling flower pot.

After such a series of accidents and minor injuries, Chen Mo was so upset that he brought this up in the office.

His friend who visited the temple with him asked, “Chen Mo, doesn’t it seem like your bad luck began after you came back from Baoyang?”

“Impossible!” Chen Mo retorted angrily.

“But you’ve been just too unlucky these past two days. And those places where you encountered your misfortunes all seem to be around Baoyang Temple.”

Chen Mo passed by Baoyang Temple several times each day, on his way to and from work and lunch. After he heard this, he froze for a second. Indeed, all the accidents happened near the temple.

His colleagues felt a chill. “You should probably go pay your respects at the temple and apologize to the god!” they advised.

“W-why should I? Anyway, I didn’t say it inside but in front of the gate.”

When Chen Mo said this, everyone knew he also was unnerved, so they stopped talking.

Chen Mo’s friend tapped his shoulder and whispered, “I’ve actually heard there was a person who said something disrespectful in a temple, and he was hit by a car after he left.”

Chen Mo said nothing.

During the noon break, Chen Mo went out to have lunch. Due to his recent misfortunes, his colleague didn’t dare to go with him for fear of being affected.

Chen Mo was annoyed and frustrated, and also a bit skeptical. Were these not coincidences? But if he really went to burn incense, he would lose face in front of his colleagues. Besides, maybe it was nothing more than an ordinary run of bad luck?

After pondering on his dilemma for a while, he decided to compromise and take a different route.

But just as he turned around, a motorbike zoomed past him and the biker snatched his phone from his hand.

“Fuck! Hey, wait!” Chen Mo desperately chased after the bike, shouting at the passersby to help him stop the thief.

But who would help him stop a speeding bike? As it disappeared in the distance, Chen Mo bent over and panted breathlessly. He decided to report this to the police so they could check the city surveillance monitors. This was outrageous! Being robbed in the city center in broad daylight!

Chen Mo straightened himself, but as soon as he took a step, his legs seemed to trip on air and he fell forward. His face kissed the ground and blood gushed out from his nose.

Chen Mo: “……”

Passersby walked around him without even sparing him a glance as if the people of Niuyang were particularly callous and indifferent today.

Ah, no, a good Samaritan appeared.

A young man crouched down and handed him a tissue. “Are you alright?”

Chen Mo looked up. It was the person who’d heard his rant about the Spirit Official that day. His face red with embarrassment, he replied, “Thank you, I-I’m fine… “

He was hoping that the young man wouldn’t recognize him, but to his disappointment, the other said, “I think it is better if you come and light incense to the venerable founder.”

Chen Mo stared at Xie Lingya with a stiff expression.

Xie Lingya slightly bowed his head to look at Chen Mo. Not only was the man’s nose still bleeding, dying the tissue red, but there was a large abrasion on his leg and the blood was already seeping through his trousers.

The venerable founder subdued the wicked and gave protection against evil. If he was angry and stopped caring, those wandering spirits were free to bully Chen Mo. A shove here and a push there—influenced by them, his luck went down too, forming a vicious cycle.

And this was just one side of the issue. Spirit Official Wang was also in charge of maintaining order in the mortal realm—maybe he had already added a bad note on your ledger?

Xie Lingya pulled up Chen Mo’s trouser legs and chanted,

Clear blood, do not flow
Turbid blood, do not surge
Salve and wraps, no better than spit².

Then he asked Chen Mo to spit. Chen Mo unconsciously followed his instructions and saw that his nose and leg stopped bleeding.

“!!!” Chen Mo looked at Xie Lingya in horror—his brain felt like it was about to explode. After a moment of staring blankly, he blurted out, “G-god’s miracle… Are you Spirit Official Wang?!”

“Isn’t your imagination too wild?” Xie Lingya gave him a look. “You non-believers exaggerate more than religious people. If I was the venerable founder, I wouldn’t have bothered to help you.”

Chen Mo: “……”

Xie Lingya: “Get up, we need to get your wound cleaned up.”

Chen Mo was still dazed as he was helped up. This person, even if he was not a god, then surely he was a demigod, right?!

Xie Lingya, on the other hand, pondered on the spell he had just used. Though it worked, it was still rather cumbersome to use since he had not mastered it.

The blood-stopping incantation that Xie Lingya had just used was from the art of Zhuyou, ritual healing.

In the 70s and 80s, there were still some elderly folks who were either practitioners of Zhuyou or happened to accidentally learn the spell. Those who studied it deeply and gained complete proficiency could cast it without reciting the incantation out loud, and the patient didn’t need to spit. Some could even cast it without seeing the patient, they only needed to know who it was.

According to the temple notes, Wang Yuji once witnessed a man falling down from some very high steps. The bleeding couldn’t be stopped, so the villagers rushed to find an elder who knew the spell.

Except for asking who was injured, the elder said nothing. However, when the messenger went back, it turned out that the man had indeed stopped bleeding and was already sent to the hospital to have the wound dressed.

Even after Chen Mo’s wound was taken care of, he had yet to calm down. He kept staring at Xie Lingya as if looking at a celestial being.

Xie Lingya had just finished the Kaiguang ceremony for the Spirit Official’s new statue. He had encountered Chen Mo when he went out to buy soy sauce. Somehow, while bringing Chen Mo back to the temple, he still found time to buy it.

“Ok, let’s go burn the incense.” Xie Lingya took Chen Mo to the side hall.

Chen Mo first saw the couplet framing the door to the hall:

The Three Eyes See All in the World, The One Whip Wakes All in the Realm

Inside the hall, the fruits and offerings were fresh and the incense lit during the ceremony was still burning. In the swaying candlelight, the brass statue of Spirit Official Wang looked even more solemn and sacred.

Especially that middle finger sticking up high and mighty as if condemning Chen Mo.

When he looked up at the Spirit Official’s statue, Chen Mo’s feelings were not the same as in the past. He had never been in the side hall and had only seen the mud statues of other gods. When he saw this brass statue, however, he was eager to pay his respects, but he wasn’t sure what exactly should he do, so he looked at Xie Lingya for help. In his mind, Xie Lingya was a demigod who could communicate with Spirit Official Wang.

Xie Lingya taught him how to light the joss sticks, explained that he should fan out the flames instead of blowing at them, that the joss sticks should be put in the incense burner less than an inch apart, and so on.

Chen Mo hurriedly lit the incense, apologized sincerely in front of the statue, and vowed to be the venerable founder’s loyal follower. He prayed for three whole minutes before putting the joss sticks in the incense burner with trembling hands.

However, the joss sticks broke almost immediately.

Chen Mo was terror-stricken. He asked, looking as if he was about to cry, “M-master, is the venerable founder refusing to forgive me?”

“Hold on,” Xie Lingya took out the broken joss sticks and thought for a moment. “You stay here.”

Chen Mo wanted to follow behind Xie Lingya. Left alone, he was terrified.

Xie Lingya brought back an old lady. Chen Mo watched as the old lady piously lit incense for the Spirit Official and prayed for a minute before leaving. Her joss sticks were standing upright in the incense burner without any sign of breaking.

Chen Mo looked at his broken joss sticks pitifully.

“Alright, please try again,” Xie Lingya motioned to Chen Mo.

Chen Mo followed the steps again. He lit three sticks and apologized for five minutes before inserting the joss sticks in the incense burner. This time, the joss sticks did not break at all.

Chen Mo sighed in relief and gave the venerable founder a tearful glance.

“Master… Can I ask why the venerable founder refused to accept the incense in the beginning?” Chen Mo inquired cautiously.

Well, broken incense… The first time it happened to him, Xie Lingya was unnerved as well. However, as it happened quite often, he got used to it; he could even guess the meaning behind it now.

“Oh, it wasn’t because of any profound reason,” Xie Lingya replied in an indifferent tone. “It’s just that it was the first offering to the venerable founder’s new statue after consecration. He wasn’t unwilling to forgive you—I’m guessing he was still in a bit of a huff and was unwilling to let the first offering come from you, so I let another follower offer the first incense.”

“…..” Chen Mo was speechless. His mood was very complicated right now…

Chen Mo had five hundred yuan on him. He put it all in the donation box and registered to be a follower. It mainly meant to leave his phone number, so that he would get message notifications whenever the temple had any events.

“The day after tomorrow is the 15th of the lunar calendar. It is the birthday of the venerable founder. If you are free, come and burn incense,” Xie Lingya said casually.

Due to limited funds, Xie Lingya didn’t dare to make a big deal out of it, it was just an internal celebration. Some temples would hold a great blessing ceremony at those times so they could get more donations, but since Baoyang Temple did not have many followers, Xie Lingya gave up on the thought.

Chen Mo, on the other hand, took it very seriously.

When he got back to the office, his colleagues noticed his new injuries and looked at him with sympathy. In their hearts, Baoyang Temple became even more mysterious.

They weren’t necessarily convinced enough to become believers, but they became determined to be respectful or they might share Chen Mo’s fate. It was obvious that not only was this god real, he also had quite a temper!

“Are your injuries serious?” a colleague asked Chen Mo. “We’re supposed to attend Xiao Liu’s wedding this weekend…”

“I can’t go,” Chen Mo said. Completely serious, he explained, “This weekend is the birthday of Spirit Official Wang, I’m going to go burn incense at Baoyang Temple.”

Everyone: “……”

What happened to Chen Mo during the lunch break? It was as if he had become a different person.

Although everyone had suggested for Chen Mo to apologize to Baoyang Temple, he’d been reluctant. Wasn’t this change a bit too sudden?

Chen Mo, still shaken from the recent ordeal, recounted how he was injured outside Baoyang Temple, how an immortal from the temple saved him, and how the joss sticks broke when he wanted to worship.

His coworkers were stunned. This time they were completely in awe of Baoyang Temple. Although they had not seen for themselves how the bleeding stopped and whether or not it was real or just psychological, they had witnessed Chen Mo’s misfortunes in the past two days.

When Chen Mo subsequently stopped having bad luck, everyone was even more shaken. They made plans to visit the temple and burn incense when they had free time. They worked near Baoyang, it was best to do it, even if just for peace of mind.

Rumors of this incident quickly spread to other companies in the office building, becoming more and more exaggerated as it tended to happen with rumors.

Due to its proximity, everyone knew of Baoyang or had even gone there before. Of course, they also heard about the temple’s amazing minor talismans. Now that someone they knew had something like this happen to him, even more people made plans to go burn incense.

In addition to minor talismans, there were now stories about supernatural incidents such as what befell Chen Mo, so everyone realized that Baoyang Temple was, in fact, a temple. As a result, the crowd coming to burn incense or ask for protection talismans grew bigger.

This was a result of accumulation. In the beginning, everyone was just impressed by the lack of mosquitoes and that the talismans were actually effective. Hearing more about similarly supernatural stuff convinced more people and made them willing to worship Spirit Official Wang.

There were also some inexplicable rumors, saying Spirit Official Wang had a really bad temper. Even if you didn’t worship him, you should be careful while passing near Baoyang, not saying profanities or spitting on the ground and so on. After all, Spirit Official Wang was a god with his middle finger sticking up, you didn’t want to provoke him.

A bad temper was one thing (although Xie Lingya would rather interpret it as the venerable founder being righteous and unyielding towards evil), but the rumor regarding the middle finger was plainly wrong.

This had always been a problem: Those who did not know the truth thought that the Spirit Official was giving the middle finger. It became even more exacerbated now that the worshippers were becoming more numerous.

Xie Lingya and Zhang Daoting could explain to the visitors over and over again that no, this was the Jade Pivot Fire Finger, the Spirit Official’s hand seal for warding off evil, it did not have that meaning. Although the venerable founder’s personality was fitting for being a fire and thunder god, it definitely wasn’t reflected in his pose!

Under such circumstances, Zhan Daoting received a young couple at the temple.

When they entered the temple, they kept looking around, but their expressions were uncertain, especially when they saw how old and worn out Baoyang was. After a long whispered discussion, they approached Zhang Daoting. “Excuse me, is there a priest surnamed Xie here?”

Zhang Daoting paused for a moment, then replied, “There is someone surnamed Xie, but he isn’t a priest.”

The couple exchanged glances. “He is not a Taoist priest?”

“For what reason are you looking for him?” Zhang Daoting asked.

Seeing how tired and unwell the two looked, he guessed that something had happened to them.

Indeed, the husband said, “We heard that there is a Mr. Xie here who has spiritual powers. We wanted to ask him for advice.”

Zhang Daoting understood immediately. He invited them to wait in the backyard and went to Xie Lingya’s room to get him.

Xie Lingya was happy when he heard it. He had only taken on two jobs. Had his fame spread so far that people were already looking for him?

When Xie Lingya saw the couple, he and the husband let out a cry at the same time.

“Xie Lingya!”

“Cheng Jie!”

They looked at each other, speechless.

The man in front of him was Xie Lingya’s senior in university, Cheng Jie. After graduating, he started working in Niuyang City. The two hadn’t seen each other for a long time.

Classmates in a close relationship with Xie Lingya knew that he had listed to do his internship at Baoyang Temple, but Cheng Jie had no idea.

Cheng Jie’s wife asked, “Ah Jie, do you know… Master Xie?”

When she saw the person they were looking for was so young, she was uncertain how to address him.

“What master?” Cheng Jie said with black lines down his forehead, “This is my junior in university, majoring in finance management. I have never seen him recite any scriptures. Isn’t this too big of a career change?”

Xie Lingya said, embarrassed, “Hey, don’t be like this, I’m actually a professional!”

Translator: Velvet
TL Check: Eques
Editor: Miiya
Proofreader: Taalia

Velvet & Eques:

If anyone has access to the English edition of Essential Formulas for Emergencies [Worth] a Thousand Pieces of Gold by Sun Simiao, translated by Sabine Wilms, we’d love to have the translation of the incantation verified.
The incantation comes from this formula: 治金疮不止令唾止痛咒法

Say hello to Taalia, who’s our new editor/proofreader probie! 🎉

On that note, we’re still looking for a TL checker for PTTP – not for the Taoist terms, just for the normal stuff, so nothing really hard. (comeoncomeoncomeoncomeon <(＿　＿)>)

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