To Raise a Soul 51.2

When Yu Zhen arrived at the apartment, Yin Yan hadn’t returned yet. After a moment’s thought, he brought the wild herbs to the kitchen.

Very quickly, the fragrance of delicious food began to drift out of the kitchen. It was then followed by the fragrance of flowers.

When Yin Yan entered the apartment, he immediately picked up on the aroma of fish soup. A corner of his lips lifted, but as he prepared to change into slippers to enter the apartment, a rotten stench drifted over. His expression changed. Without changing out of his shoes, he took large steps towards the kitchen.

Yu Zhen was chopping green onions in the kitchen. A pot of fish soup was boiling on the stovetop, and two freshly made dishes were on the table.

Hearing Yin Yan’s movements, Yu Zhen looked towards the kitchen door. Seeing Yin Yan, he smiled. “You’re back. Wash your hands and get ready to eat.”

Yin Yan didn’t reply. He looked around the kitchen until his gaze fell upon a sack in a corner of the room. “What is that?”

After turning his head to look at the corner, Yu Zhen finally remembered about the wild herbs. “You smelled that? It’s some wild herbs, but they carry some evil energy. I got it from the plant nursery’s owner. His son’s illness and issues with the plant nursery are both related to this. I’m planning to make some hua gao^[1]  with some special ingredients, then send it to them as a gift. It’ll help get rid of the evil energy lingering within their bodies so they’ll be cleansed before they return to their hometown.”

Yin Yan relaxed at his words. Taking extra precautions, he added, “Things with evil energy should never be consumed. It’ll affect your cultivation.”

Yu Zhen froze in the middle of chopping the spring onions. He looked at Yin Yan guiltily.

Concern welled up again in Yin Yan. “You ate some?”

“Just a bite.” Yu Zhen demonstrated with a hand, bringing his finger and thumb close together to emphasize that it was a very, very small bite. Seeing Yin Yan stare at him, brows furrowed and silent, Yu Zhen hurriedly added, “I ate a dumpling made with these wild herbs. I only had one! After eating it, I had a detoxifying pill straight away! I’m fine right now, I promise!”

Yin Yan’s frown did not loosen one bit from his words. He strode forward and stooped over, placing his forehead over Yu Zhen’s. His spiritual energy surged forward.

A warm energy spread from where their foreheads met. Feeling as if a part of his head was being probed, Yu Zhen’s eyelashes trembled and his eyes closed without his notice.

The warmth spread from his forehead and circulated his body once before it circled around his dantian and finally retreated back through his forehead. 

Yin Yan stepped back and fed Yu Zhen another pill. His frown finally loosened. “In the future, don’t just eat any random food.”

He hadn’t expected Yin Yan to care much about this issue. Opening his eyes, Yu Zhen swallowed the pill and nodded. 

The wild herbs were confiscated by Yin Yan, and Yu Zhen was forced to take a very extravagant bath using Yin Yan’s spiritual essence. 

At night, even without Yu Zhen’s shameless clinging, Yin Yan took the initiative to lead him to his room. They slept near to each other, with Yin Yan holding onto Yu Zhen and periodically using his spiritual energy to sweep through Yu Zhen’s body. 

There’s practically no difference between this and dallying with a woman.

Yu Zhen shrank into Yin Yan’s arms. When spiritual energy moved over his waist once again, he couldn’t help but let out a low groan. Red-faced, he pushed Yin Yan away and pulled the blankets over his head. “Y-you, don’t do this.”

Yin Yan paused for a second. It was the first time he had been pushed away by Yu Zhen. “What’s the matter?”

Yu Zhen pulled down the blanket and eyed Yin Yan. Too embarrassed to say that he was indulging in his own fantasies, he reached out a hand and murmured, “Pill. Let me have one.”

Immediately, Yin Yan sat up seriously, gave him a detoxifying pill, and leaned over in an attempt to place their foreheads together. “What’s wrong? Did the evil energy affect you?”

How can this man be so stupid?!

Yu Zhen pushed the pill back. Seeing Yin Yan move closer, he squeezed his eyes shut and took hold of Yin Yan’s hand. He moved it under the quilt, and then guided it under his shirt and onto his lower abdomen. Almost inaudible, Yu Zhen whispered, “Don’t use your spiritual energy anymore. I can’t handle it…” 

It was the boldest thing Yu Zhen had dared to do so far. It far overstepped the bounds of propriety, but it conveyed the situation clearly.

The temperature of the skin under Yin Yan’s palm was very high. Close to his fingers, a certain organ had a reaction and the heat it emitted was hard to miss.

Yin Yan couldn’t resist pressing his palm against the belly, but he restrained himself from moving his hand any lower. Instead, he looked downwards at the red-faced Yu Zhen and gulped.

“Is it hard to bear?”

“Wh-what?” Yu Zhen didn’t understand his question.

Yin Yan’s fingers tapped on his belly as if he was playing on a piano. He pressed down slightly and asked, “Here…Is it hard to bear?”

Poof – 

Smoke emitted from Yu Zhen’s head. His intellect and soul escaped his body.

This calm and honorable person! Talking about a censor-worthy topic in a low voice is… is really making it unbearable!

And what damned question is this?! If that place on a man is stirred up but ignored, of course, it would be hard to bear!

Too embarrassed to answer, he kept his eyes firmly shut and burrowed further into the blankets. Unexpectedly, Yin Yan’s hand shifted downwards with him, remaining firmly attached to his abdomen.

Yu Zhen was ready to spontaneously combust. The area around his belly seemed to have become a ball of fire. 

I wish Yin Yan’s hand would go downwards a little. Just a little bit…

Pop.

Yin Yan had turned off the light but hadn’t removed his hand. He laid down and continued touching that lower abdomen as he shifted Yu Zhen into his arms. Then he continued using spiritual energy to sweep through Yu Zhen’s body.

… If you’re not going to do it, why tease?!

Yu Zhen’s breathing turned even more haggard with each passing moment. Truly unable to take any more of the torment, he pushed away Yin Yan’s hand. “Quick, give me a pill.”

“What pill?” 

“One that can help me calm down!” Yu Zhen was almost at the point of roaring at him. Why didn’t I realize he was so terrible before?! He knows the answer but still insists on asking!

Yin Yan also sat up before calmly looking at Yu Zhen. “Naughty boy.”

“…”

Aaaahhhhh!

Yu Zhen was mad.

I am an adult! Not a child! How can I be “naughty” if I was teased by the one I like?!

“Are you giving it or aren’t you – mffffph!”

Yin Yan suddenly leaned down and kissed him.

They toppled onto the bed. Yu Zhen’s anger vanished and his body softened. He raised his head to kiss Yin Yan.

“Sometimes, venting appropriately… promotes cultivation.”

While being embraced, Yin Yan’s spiritual energy enveloped him. His consciousness dimmed and he faintly heard Yin Yan’s low and husky voice. The unmoving hand on his lower abdomen began probing again before slowly moving south.

He couldn’t care less about cultivation or his stirred up spiritual energy. He was overcome with a heat that made him ignore how hard it was to breathe. Yu Zhen tenaciously held onto the person before him, and after the indulgent moment passed, he fell asleep feeling comfortable and relieved.

Yin Yan kissed his sweaty forehead, then went to clean his hand. He took a pill out and looked at it before leaning down, pressing their foreheads together, and sending his spiritual energy out again.

After venting, Yu Zhen’s previously excited merits and spiritual energy fell into a lethargic state. Yin Yan easily ferreted out the sliver of unfamiliar, evil energy that had attempted to hide earlier. Surrounding it, Yin Yan carefully extracted it before burning it away with true fire.

“You worry-free rascal.” You cause trouble as soon as I let you out of my sight. 

He lightly touched Yu Zhen’s sleeping face and kissed his eyes before heading to the bathroom.

The pills can’t suppress this desire, but something primitive like a cold bath might work. 

Yu Zhen had another dream. In his dream, he had long hair and he had wasted away into a thin and pallid figure. His face was pale and bruised, as if he had just been seriously injured. 

He laid atop a cozy bed that was surrounded by simple and unadorned furniture. He wore a white chang pao^[2] with gold details. Its ill-fit marked it as someone else’s clothes.

A man wearing the same gold-patterned white robe sat by the bed with a bowl in his hand.

“Eat.”

The voice sounded cool and calming. From the wide cuffs, a hand with long and slender fingers was clear, but the person’s face couldn’t be seen with any clarity.

Turning his head, he used a cold defiance to cover up his sadness. “There’s no point. My dantian has already shattered. No matter how many spiritual panacea I eat, it can’t be mended.”

“Then don’t mend it.”

The man’s words were calm and toneless, but it somehow seemed dependable and trustworthy.

“There are three thousand Ways of cultivation^[3] Dantian is not the only path to becoming an immortal.”

He was clearly touched by those words, but with the wave of a hand, he lifted and smashed the bowl. Viciously, he roared, “Get lost! Don’t meddle in my business! Don’t think that just because you’d saved me, that I’d be grateful! I hate self-righteous cultivators like you the most!”

The room was quiet. The medicine bowl had been smashed and its contents, made from precious materials, evaporated into the air soon after reaching the ground.

“Rest well.” The man beside the bed stood up and calmly continued, “Intense emotions are not good for your cultivation.”

The man picked up the broken pieces of the bowl and lit a medicinal joss stick before finally leaving.

The violent anger subsided. He sat up and leaned against the bed frame. After a long time had passed, he lifted a hand and tried to gather spiritual energy, but only an evil, black energy gathered at his hand. 

“Why..?” His hand dropped back to the bed and his eyes were devoid of life. “I really did survive. Why?” 

The scene changed. It was a time when he could walk by himself. However, because his dantian had shattered and his cultivation was lost, his wounds healed slowly and his body was tormented by evil energy. Even a simple task such as walking was an extreme struggle.

His forehead was covered in cold sweat. He gritted his teeth and continued walking forwards, trying to leave the land of peach blossoms^[4]  where the man in white robes had placed him.

The man in white didn’t stop him but lingered behind at a distance that was neither near nor far. The whole time, if he turned around, he would be able to see that man.

“Don’t follow me anymore!” He turned around and snarled at the man. His legs were shaking, seeming like he could fall at any moment.

The man in white looked at him quietly and then shook his head. “You can’t hold on much longer.”

“That’s not true!”

The man in white didn’t speak and continued to look at him.

“That’s really not true!”  Flustered and exasperated, he displayed a rare moment of childishness, shouting at the man, “Why are you following me?! I’m disabled and I’m useless and I have a bad temper! Are you lacking in people to scold you?! Are you not angry?! Shouldn’t you regret saving me?! I’m begging you here! Can you just pretend I’m already dead?! Look! Don’t you see that my body’s filled with evil energy? Since ancient times, spiritual energy and evil energy have been incompatible! You might as well kill me! Just kill me!”

“That’s impossible.”

“You-!” He clenched his teeth. He was angry at the man before him, but his shouting almost brought him to tears instead. After pointing his finger at the man for a long time, he finally turned around and continued walking.

“One.”

A calm voice followed him. He clenched his fists.

“Two.”

His legs were shaking, his clothes were drenched with cold sweat, and his feet seemed to weigh a thousand jin.

“Three.”

Thump. 

His heart suddenly thumped violently and a splitting pain erupted along the meridians of his legs. He felt a sudden cold in his shattered dantian. The evil energy which had been barred entry took the sudden opportunity and rushed in. 

He fell to the ground, onto his stomach, and coughed up a mouthful of blood. Unable to do anything else, he watched as demonic veins spread along the back of his hands. His body trembled and he closed his eyes in despair.

The evil energy has entered my heart. There is no longer any hope.

After all is said and done… I ended up showing this ugly sight to my savior and benefactor.

A sudden warmth touched his body. He was turned over onto his back and brought into a warm embrace. Opening his eyes, he saw the pale, slender, and long fingers reach over and touch the blood on his lips. Lifting a hand, he wanted to block the view of his sorry figure.

“Like a puppy.”

The man who can’t go three sentences without talking about cultivation has said something teasing. He trembled and clenched his fist.

Yes, I’m a dog. I’m a dog that has been abandoned. I’m a stray dog that has failed completely.

His nose stung and he struggled. “Let go…”

“And quite cute.”

The man interrupted his words and patted his head before picking him up. The world spun around them, bringing them back to the room where he had been resting. Gently, he was lowered onto the bed and covered with blankets. 

“Sleep.” A cleaning technique swept across him, removing all traces of his previously sorry state. His head was patted once again and the man said, “Everything will be better when you wake up.” 

He was bundled up and surrounded with warm spiritual energy which forced his body to relax. Struggling, he tried to stay awake. Before the man left, he managed to open his eyes slightly. As he faced the lofty back, he mumbled, “You…Why do you treat me…”

So well…

From within his hazy vision, the man seemed to pause. The man turned towards him and said, “Because you are my…”

His consciousness gave way to complete darkness, leaving him unable to hear the whole sentence. 

Why couldn’t I hold on just a bit longer? So…So what is the reason?

[It’s karma. It’s a debt. It’s an obstruction on the path to immortality. What else could it be?]

A vicious, taunting voice seemed to answer from the depths of his soul. 

When Yu Zhen opened his eyes, he found himself in a room lit by the morning light. He was laying in a bed, and Yin Yan was not beside him.

Click. The door opened and Yin Yan stepped through, carrying with him the scent of sweet congee.

A missing piece of his heart was immediately stuffed full. He jumped out of bed and ran to Yin Yan. Not fully awake from his dream, he blurted, “Yin Yan, why are you so good to me?”

Yin Yan froze and looked at him quietly.

Suddenly nervous, Yu Zhen’s heart beat loudly. His eyes were opened wide and filled with a willfulness that he himself didn’t notice. 

Yin Yan looked into his eyes, reached out, and touched his face. 

“Because…”

Yu Zhen held his breath.

“… You are the one I like,” Yin Yan replied. He then rapped his forehead and instructed, “Put on your shoes and go wash up. Mom’s here.”

The one I like.

The. One. I. Like. 

Fireworks seemed to explode in his mind. Yu Zhen looked dumbly at Yin Yan and let out an “Ah” sound.

Yin Yan pinched his face, seeming to find the silly expression amusing. 

“I won’t say I like you!” Yu Zhen suddenly pulled Yin Yan’s hand away. Like a madman, he took a step back and looked back at Yin Yan. With a solemn expression, he said, “You’d better give up! I won’t say it! Even if I die, I won’t say it!”

Yin Yan silently retrieved a pill.

Yu Zhen rushed into the bathroom without looking back. He locked himself inside and splashed himself with cold water.

“…”

Yin Yan stuffed the pill into his mouth and loosened the hand which was used to pinch Yu Zhen’s cheeks. A trace of evil energy floated within it. It was an obsession from the depths of the soul.

Did you care about it so much?

“I’m sorry,” he murmured. He lowered his eyes, hiding the emotions within them.

I’m sorry. I didn’t learn to hold your hands when we first met.